Teens and Sexual Pressure

The pressure on teens to have sex is considerable. Not only do they have to contend with the direct pressure to “do it” from their date or steady boyfriend or girlfriend, there’s the peer pressure applied by friends who want to know if they’ve done “it.” They may also feel the internal pressure to keep pace with their friends, as if competing in a marathon to lose their virginity.

Many parents don’t realize how important it is to teach their child that dating and sex do not go hand in hand. Many teens assume that sex is a normal part of dating. And why wouldn’t they? Magazines, movies, TV, and their friends all give them this message on a regular basis.

Don’t just assume your child knows the difference; tell them as often as you can. Make sure to teach your children from an early age the difference between dating and sex. Stress it often. Help your teen understand that dating is about getting to know the other person emotionally, not just physically.

Suggest other things to do with someone rather than have sex. It may seem silly, but many times sex comes up as an option because teens are bored and have nothing else to do or think about.

Many people teach their children different ways to say no to sex. They come up with excuses or clever quips. The problem is: an excuse only works once. If your teen just brushes off the issue without making their opinions clear, they will face the same problem over and over again. Teach your child to say no sternly and clearly. While they may want to give reasons, but they shouldn’t have to. No should be enough.

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